The Winning Curse

News is often full of fallen heroes; fallen to drugs, crime or bribery. Leadership is not the same as management or winning at all costs. Leadership is about being the best of who we are, leading by example and in the process creating other Leaders, not followers.

Hero worshiping is creating serious anomalies in our society and there is a need for our prime caregivers and education systems to re-frame and redefine how we are motivating our youth and what success means.

Ego is not the same as self-worth and self-respect. Ego is the opposite!

In my opinion Ego is the result of self-denial, where the value of oneself is so low, that from a young age we start comparing ourselves with others to create an avatar of ourselves that becomes our Ego; that we manipulate like a chameleon in every aspect of our life (friendships, relationships, work, play, etc) in order to cover-up that innate sense of worthlessness. This is exacerbated by the emphasis of our care-givers, from a very young age, where we are compared with others and where others (winners!) are established as yardsticks of success. Being individuals, we never match those others that we are compared with and that which we are taught to revere and thus starts the process of creating our fake avatar, the chameleon.

In this process, depression is a very likely path as we learn to suppress that who we are while we act in behaviors that make us appear to be successful, as defined by others. That suppression leads to depression.

And depression is not even the worst outcome. Performance enhancement drugs, bribery and crime often are outcomes that destroy our lives and those of those around us.

Our newspapers are currently full of devastating news like Pistorius, Lance Armstrong, extensive doping in Australian sports, and other fallen heroes/organisations.

The issue, is that instead of looking at this as an epidemic of our times, driven by our trained focus to "win at all costs", we look at these disasters as individual cases. Doing so, we continue making a bad situation worse.

The answer is simple but not so easy to deploy. It is simply about motivating our young to explore that which motivates them from the inside and for them to feel contented and loved for simply being who they are; rather than the unnatural pressure from day one to be better than the Jones's, to make more money, to drive better cars, wear set brands, etc...

And there is nothing wrong with aspiring to having the best that this world has on offer, and more. The difference is the motivation that gets us to achieve these, that needs to be internalized rather externalised; meaning, motivated from within rather than motivated by comparing ourselves with others.

Whether you are a mother, a school teacher, a manager or an orator, be a Leader and inspire others by motivating that beautiful energy that lies within them that will yield astounding results to themselves, your family and your organisation.

In our definition, Leaders are those that create Leaders and Leadership starts with one owning the responsibility of taking a Lead in their own life! Whether you know it or not, you are a Leader! Leaders exist in all walks of life. They are mothers, CEOs, volunteers, spiritualists, care-givers, receptionists, and the list goes on. However not all these role players are Leaders.

http://www.aldogrech.com

Believers and Chameleons

Leaders are believers. The rest are chameleons. And there is nothing necessarily wrong with any of these options as long as this is a conscious choice. By believers we do not mean religious or cultural beliefs, but organic and granular beliefs we were born with (our purpose and passion) often derailed and apparently lost in the process of turning us natural beings into normalized (domesticated) beings.

We all have innate beliefs and most of us, mostly subconsciously, discount them to blindly follow others' (civilization trains us towards this); we become chameleons, adapting to environments with the main objective being safety! Never quite exposing our authentic selves.

The few of us that live by our beliefs and values, have tapped into that leader that exists in each and every one of us.

This simple concept of personal beliefs and values, is often a great challenge for most of us preferring instead to live an inauthentic life that leads us to depression and despair. Most then medicate (often subconsciously) through things such as need for money, authority, shopaholic tendencies, alcoholism, workaholism, gambling, drugs and various other forms of obvious and often less obvious addictions.

These distractions are meant to fill that gaping hole left by our self-avoidance and self-negation, but they often do not and the only answer then is prescription drugs, which is no option at all. Well, maybe one step better than the suicide option!

Living from our authentic self is the only answer and the magic of leadership and self-fulfillment while contributing to society from our purpose and passion. The alternative is not a feasible option as most of us, in our authentic moments of clarity, are able to see but seem unable to follow-through.

So, be a leader in whatever you do; at home, at work, in your hobby, etc. And discover the leader in you that will lead you to greater peace, fulfillment and abundance.

Else, there is always prescription drugs and the despair of Ego.

Aldo Grech - CXO Consulting

Leadership Cannot be Trained! But......

Managers, CEO's, and other similar titles, are manufactured human concepts that are based around a set of specifications (job descriptions) mainly designed at the start of the industrial revolution to slot people into roles, to deliver results for business owners or to create support infrastructures around these businesses.

Indeed a very successful number of decades have transpired that seem to have vindicated this structure. However, this is also the structure that created the destruction and greed, that resulted in the GFC (Global Financial Crises).

Like those explorers before us, that gave us access to lands far away and that have reached out into the cosmos, Leaders seem to come out of nowhere and stretch our imagination further than we thought was possible. Leaders like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Richard Branson and Larry Ellison were orphans, nerds or school drop-outs. before they redefined the same world we live in.

There is no curriculum that these people followed to realize their visions to achieve such outstanding results. They merely believed in, and focused on their innate intuition, the Leader inside each and every one of us; our purpose.

Now there have been many studies, writings and biographies, designed to explain the phenomena, that these and other similar luminaries are. However, none of this literature will make another person a Leader. One might break down the successes into studies and come-up with formulas for success and possibly emulate some of their successes, but rise to their measure or even create new disruptive directions, highly unlikely.

However, there is a way, (the way these luminaries achieved their amazing feats) simply by tapping into your innate Leader, by following that which your heart tells you. Doing this because of your belief, passion and conviction and not because you need a job, a stylish car, a house the envy of the neighbourhood, or other "normal" objectives. Because you, like each and every one of us, have been blessed with an innate design that created us and made us unique. Humanity needs your unique intellect, creativity and contributions and you know what they are, if you stop the noise of "normality" and tap into the silence of your gifts. Share them with the rest of us, as this is your god given right and duty. Be proud of your purpose and do not be derailed by the voices of fear from those that, "wish the best for you", and plagued and shackled by "normality", divert you from your natural course. They too will be inspired by your eventual achievements. Be a Leader and show us the way in your chosen field, craft, business or adventure.

Go, be a Leader whether you are a store person, a reception, sales manager, CEO, entrepreneur or even a parent, and create the new in whatever you do.

There Is No "I" In Nature

We live in an ecosystem that's made-up of subset and superset ecosystems. They are inter-reliant and by their nature are very fragile. This fragility ensures the ongoing evolution of the same ecosystem that relies on this mechanism as its method of survival and development.

Humankind is an ecosystem within this ecosystem. Unbalance in an ecosystem creates shifts that alter our ecosystem for the better; survival. Sometimes this happens at the cost of some specious as we have seen with the dinosaurs. If humankind really desires longevity in this ecosystem, we need to respect this balance or suffer the worst possible outcome for our kind.

All ecosystems are constantly in a state of change and rebalancing as they become more and more resilient. Humans are one phase of this ongoing ecosystem change. So by design, we are transient and as we transition to our next stage (should there be one), we need to work collectively towards this aim. There are many nascent initiatives, towards this goal, some spiritual, some industrial and others conceptual. I believe that the real answer lies in the "WE". The energy that lives these ecosystems is one energy and it is the same energy that is us. It is one and the same energy that lives and breaths us as does trees, and every other living organism. As one, we are able to continue the evolution of our species. As "I", we are one-by-one, driven by the greed and ego of "I" destroying the "We", our same humanity as we destroy our planet.

The "I" results from our upbringing, in a society that has been galvanized by the success of the individual. But this is a misguided notion as real success stories are underpinned by the work of a collective rather than one individual. The greed of our Ego is driving us to compete at any cost, in the process losing ourselves, our families, our sense of compassion and more importantly humankind, as we race blinded by the objective of being the ultimate winner who, in our culture is defined as the one with most money.

There is no "I" in nature but the collective "We" that includes the cosmos, our solar system, our beautiful planet, the trees, the oceans, you and I. Our fear and shame drives our Ego to achieve at all cost, in the process losing everything. And yet, the alternative brings so much more adundance, peace and happiness, bundles of compassion and a humanity that lives as one with nature and itself.

Call me a dreamer. However, at 55 and many of these years driven by greed, I see the only real alternative we have, which is to focus on our creativity rather than the greed of Ego. The only real and sustainable wealth!